So, we’ve dealt (effectively, we hope!) with fans, customers and patrons. We moved on to business partners. In this final segment of our communication column, Artist finally gets her chance to speak…

Communicating with Peers: Artist
     Finally, Artist gets to talk! No doubt she was getting frustrated sitting in the corner. Marketer didn’t want her talking to fans lest she become an Artist Behaving Badly in the press. Business Manager didn’t want her talking to business partners lest she come across as pathetic and underconfident. But finally, among peers she can be herself!
     Mostly. It’s still easy for Artist to get in trouble, particularly if she’s plagued by insecurities (as so many of us are). There are artists who are doing better than we are—whether it’s financially or artistically—that might incite our envy and self-doubt; there are artists who are not as good as we are that tempt us to make snippy comments about how far they have to go, or how they only wish they were where you were.

     So how to navigate these pitfalls? Keep the watchword for peer relationships in mind: fellowship.
     Why fellowship? Because you were once a newbie artist yourself. And one day you might become that hyper-successful artist you admire. But every artist is on a path, and you’re all traveling it together. Your goal is to become the graceful artist who helps the new people (the way she would have liked to be helped back then) and takes notes from the more experienced ones, while capable of sharing her own experiences, lessons learned and enthusiasms with others.

     So let’s deal with some practicalities.

How to Deal with Jealousy (and Envy, and Discouragement, and…)
     We might as well start with the elephant in the room, the issue most of us will struggle with and no one wants to admit to. That artist over there is making more money. The artist next door has more fame. And that artist over there is so much more talented we want to crawl into a hole and never come out.
      It’s inevitable that most of us will have these moments. If we’re lucky they really are moments, brief thoughts that come and go… if we’re not, they’re soundtracks we hear over and over in our head, comparing us unfavorably to other people and either ragging on ourselves for it, or wishing ill things on other people. So what to do?
      The three Jaguars have no easy answer for this one, alas. Or we do, but it’s a somewhat painful one:

      And that’s really the truth of us as artists. We grieve, we suffer, we rage, and the best place to deal with all that is the studio, where we can transform it into something more productive. Still, there’s only so much time you can spend in the studio; eventually you have to walk outside, if only for groceries. And if you vanish too completely into your work, you won’t have access to the people who really do understand you: how you work, what you care about so much, and what your struggles are. You want to get out to talk to others! And those angers and insecurities can get in the way. So here are some step-by-steps for dealing with negative feelings inspired by your peers:

1. Keep it to yourself.
      No one wants to hear bad things about someone else. No one ever has, or there wouldn’t be fables about foxes and grapes that have survived for centuries. Don’t get a reputation for pettiness. It’s terrible for PR, and to be honest, it’s no good for your spirit either. You might think talking other people down helps you, but all it does is shape you into the kind of person who needs to hurt other people to feel good.
      Remember, you are the tool you use to bring your art into the universe. Don’t sully the brush.

2. Practice positive thinking.
      Yeah, yeah, you say. We’ve heard this one before. But not the way the jaguars suggest. Instead of looking at a more successful artist and thinking, ‘I hate them! I wish they would fail!’ (very bad) or ‘they’re nice people, they deserve their success’ (typical, but what are we, saints?) think instead… ‘hey, they’re successful… maybe I can learn something from them. Or ask them for advice.’ The writer who’s faster at writing novels… maybe they’d be willing to tell you how they do it. Or the musician who seems to have booked a thousand gigs could tell you how he got started. Instead of looking at other artists as competition, think of them as allies and resources. Instead of thinking of other people’s success as a threat, think of it as an opportunity to learn something that you could use.
      Don’t worry: you don’t have to become someone else to learn something useful from them. Even if you decide that the successful novelist’s tips for writing faster won’t work for you, just considering the ideas will probably bring you to a better understanding of your own process and priorities.
      Remember:

3. Do the work.
      In the end the best anodyne for discouragement, fear, envy and jealousy is… to do more work. Your work, the work that nourishes you. Returning to your art and immersing yourself in it will not only help you feel more accomplished (and get more accomplished), it will remind you that what other people are doing is not relevant. The only thing that matters is you and the work. Let the art itself reset your perspective, and remind you that there are more important things than whether someone else has t-shirts in the mall.
      Fame is fleeting, money comes and goes. The feeling you get when you sit down to make something… that will always be yours, true, and eternal.

     In the end, the only way to deal with negative feelings is to practice fostering positive ones. Make no mistake, this does take practice. But the more you concentrate on positive actions and words, the more your thoughts will fall in line. Let’s move on to some positive communicative acts for our peers.

Paying It Forward
      One of the most important concepts in the art social ecosystem is also one of the oldest in disguise; we call it “paying it forward,” but the world knows it as a version of the golden rule.

      Paying it forward is the acknowledgement that someone helped us when we were confused and new to something, and so it’s our job to turn around and help someone else. And if you were so unlucky as to never have had that help, then paying it forward is your way of saying, “I refuse to let someone else go through what I did, and struggle alone.”
      There are a lot of ways to pay it forward, but most of them involve answering questions and demonstrating things you’ve learned to other people. You can do this in email, on forums, in person at shows or during meet-ups. Anyplace you’re gathered with your peers, virtually or physically, there’s an opportunity to show kindness to someone who has a question, or make a suggestion when someone reveals their frustrations to you. You can do it as formally or casually as you like: if you prefer structured time, you might give a free seminar at the high school or college you graduated from, or if you’d rather something more casual you could simply give advice to someone at a party (who has asked for it: unwanted advice is a Bad Thing). Get into the habit of kindness, and choose as many forms of paying it forward as you can manage.

     But wait! You say. I don’t have time to help a lot of people!

      The three jaguars are sympathetic. There will come a point in the career of even a modestly successful artist when you will be receiving more mail and more attention than you can possibly field while still getting any work done. It’s not necessary to martyr yourself to pay it forward, and no one would ask you to. As you grow more pressed for time (or more stressed), limit your activities to the number of charitable acts you can handle. Maybe you can’t give a free talk at the bookstore about independent publishing without cutting too badly into your writing time, or answer all the emails you get about the topic. But you could maybe write a FAQ about it and leave it on your website, and in the future you can direct people looking for help there.
      Remember: do unto others what you’d have them do unto you. And that brings us neatly to…

Asking for Advice
      …the other end of the spectrum, when you’re the one who needs help. One of the most useful skills you can cultivate is how to learn from other people, and how not to be afraid to ask them about how they got to where they are. Most of us are convinced that successful people have no time for us, or wouldn’t want to bother talking to us, or don’t want to share their secrets, and that might be true of some slim number of them. But most artists like talking about their work and are flattered that someone might want their opinion (wouldn’t you be?). So don’t let the handful of nasty curmudgeons discourage you. There’s a lot your peers can teach you if you’re willing to ask. Here are some basic tips:

1. Be courteous.
      Remember, you are a stranger asking someone for advice. Don’t demand help, and don’t act like you expect to be indulged. Be casual and friendly, and not familiar. Try openers like, “I really admire the way you x… how did you do it?” or “Your newest work was a big success! How did you get so many people in the door at the opening?”
      Even if the person you’re approaching is someone you already know, it’s still good to be polite.

2. Be specific.
      It’s hard for someone to help you if you don’t know what you want help on. Worse, a nebulous question suggests that the conversation might drag on. If you want to know how someone writes three novels a year, that’s what you should ask about… and if the conversation rambles on past that, then all the better. But have in mind at least a few things you want to learn before you approach someone.

3. Don’t talk about yourself if you can at all avoid it.
     Your goal is to get your peer to tell you something you don’t know, so you want to keep the conversation focused on them: their work process, their style, their business practices, their methodologies, their techniques. Whatever it is you want to know, ask them about it and let them talk. If necessary, you can mention your specific problem: “I can’t seem to get my hems to stop gapping, do you have any advice on how to flatten them out?” But don’t turn it into an advertisement. “My latest book isn’t selling many copies and I don’t know what to do,” is acceptable. A long digression on your book, why it’s awesome, why you can’t fathom why it’s not selling, mentioning its title prominently isn’t. You’re there to learn, not to advertise. If at the conclusion of the conversation, your peer wants to know more about your work… then you hand over the business card or URL.

4. Watch for Signals That Your Conversation Partner is Done
      The most gracious thing you can learn is when to stop. Few people practice this one, reasoning that their goal is to get information and if they stop before they’ve gotten it, what’s the point? But pressing your peers for advice is not the same as pressing a business partner for results. Your business partners are under contract with you to deliver something, and if they fail or if they look like they’re failing, it’s your job to figure out what’s going on. But your peers are under no such obligation, and pressing them when they want to be free of the conversation will result in you getting a reputation for being creepy or obnoxious. And then no one will want to talk to you.
      So, get used to signs that someone might be done with you. In person, twitching, fidgeting or someone’s eyes frequently moving away from you are good signs. Or if they say things that sound like closers: “I’ll be sure to get back to you about that,” or “that’s true, it’s been nice talking to you.” If the person talking with you changes their pattern: if they were talking a great deal, for instance, and are now saying “I see” or “yeah” every once in a while, they may be tired of the conversation. Be polite and disengage: “It was nice talking to you,” or “Thanks for the tips, they were really helpful,” or “Well, all this talking has made me parched, I think I’m ready for a refill.” At that point, if it was a good conversation, ask for a card, or exchange cards, and go.
      In email and chat, long pauses or delays between replies are signs that someone either doesn’t want to continue the conversation, or is being distracted to the point that they shouldn’t be expected to continue. This is not necessarily a reflection on you or the conversation, merely on the fact that virtual conversations are often asynchronous, and you should expect them to be prone to interruption. If your latest email doesn’t get a response, assume the conversation is done, or that your peer is wrecked with stress or workload. Get into the habit of thinking that way: “They must be really busy, hope/glad things are going well for them,” rather than this way: “Wow, they didn’t even bother to answer me, what a snob.”
      Because trust the three jaguars: one day you will be that person. So once again:

      So all this talk about other artists, but very little talk about meeting them! Let’s talk about….

Artists’ Organizations
      Oh yes! We have them! There are organizations for cartoonists (no painters allowed, and very strict definitions!) to poets and every kind of artist and crafter in between. There are local organizations and national ones. There are tiny ones that offer nothing but a newsgroups now and then, to vast, sprawling ones that even offer group health insurance rates. If you wanted, you could probably spend a huge chunk of money on annual fees for dozens of organizations, and fill your inbox and mailbox with newsletters and glossy member magazines.
      The question is… do you want to?
      Most of us will want to join some form of professional organization. They’re a good way to keep abreast of industry news, opportunities and grants, and legal issues that apply to our work. Some organizations offer substantial benefits to members: legal counsel, emergency funds, seminars and classes (naturally in return for substantial fees). But how do you choose? Here are some steps:

1. Investigate your choices. Do an internet search for your particular craft and organizations. Go to local shops where your art is sold or taught and check their billboards for local groups. Compile a list of different organizations available to you, their membership requirements, their fees and their benefits. Don’t forget to note their locations and where they have their monthly or annual meetings.

2. Decide on your priorities. What do you want out of an organization? Are you looking for local meetings so you can hang out with other artists? Do you want more information on grants? Do you need legal help? Do you want to get listed on a specific, highly-trafficked organization’s website? Narrow down your choices to the organizations that fulfill the most priorities.

3. Budget, budget, budget. Have Business Manager haul out the books and see what kind of money you can allocate to organizational fees. If you only have enough for the one big national organization, is it worth it to you to forgo joining two smaller local or regional groups?

4. Preview. If at all possible, try to preview the group. If it’s a local one, show up at one of the meetings: most organizations will let you come by for a night to see if it suits you. If it’s a larger group, try ordering a copy of their newsletter/magazine, or reading their newsgroup archives to see if the kind of information they’re sharing and the vibe is what you’re seeking.

5. Extended Preview. Commit to trying out some of these organizations for a year by paying their dues and participating in their events. The only way to really see if you’re a good fit for an organization is by trying it out. And if it doesn’t suit you, then don’t continue paying the dues.

     Finally, remember that it’s perfectly okay to decide you don’t want the hassle of dealing with an artists’ organization. There are a lot of benefits to doing so, but if there’s nothing out there that works for you, helps you, or introduces you to people you can talk shop with, save your money.

When to Stop Talking
     When you get a good chemistry going with a party, a peer, a group, it can be invigorating. Artist is energized by the creative flow and excited by the chance to talk with people who know exactly what she means. It can become very addictive, helping other people with their problems and talking with people more successful than you about their strategies.
      So addictive, in fact, that Artist might be tempted to do it all the time. Particularly since Business Manager and Marketer have the lock-down on every other form of communication.
      Remember: you’re an artist. And getting the work done means you have to stop hanging out, drinking the coffee, and actually paint. Communication is an important business tool, but in the end, the business is without purpose if the Artist doesn’t work; Marketer doesn’t have anything to sell. Business Manager doesn’t have anything to distribute or license. And eventually, Artist won’t have anything to talk to her peers about, having become one of those artists who talks about doing art but never does it.
     So put the work first. The communication will take care of itself.

Sample Responses

Positive Situations
• “Oh, sure, I’ve done crowdfunding before. I’ve only got a few minutes before my next panel but I can give you a couple of tips. I’ve also written it up on my website, so you can go there later if you want more information.”
• “You know, you’re really good at managing people! How did you learn to do that?”
• “So-and-so’s really helpful, she’s made a lot of money doing things just like this… maybe you could ask her about it? She’s helped me before.”

Negative Situations
• “That artist didn’t answer my email about this question I had… hm… I wonder who else does something similar, that I could ask?”
• “Artist X always makes me feel like a tyro and never seems to say nice things about anyone. I think I’ll go see what Artist Y is like, maybe they’ll have a more positive attitude.”
• “Someone told me that Artist Z said I was a hack. I guess everyone’s got an opinion. I’ll just get back to work.”

Don’t Do or Say This:
• “You’re so good you make me sick!”

Who wants to hear this? Seriously. It takes a compliment (“you’re so good”) and forces the person to feel guilt about it (“you make me feel bad”). If you want to compliment another artist, do it without emotional arm-twisting. They’re not responsible for your feelings of envy, and forcing it on them is ugly.

In Conclusion
      Succeeding as a businessperson inevitably involves relationships. Your goal is to nurture the good ones, and as with all relationships (social or professional), doing so requires good communication. There’s a lot to think about in this column, and inevitably you’re not going to get it all straight or right at first… that’s okay! Just be mindful about the things you say and write; be polite, kind and keep your priorities straight; and you’ll get the hang of it. You’ll definitely have plenty of practice!
      This concludes our communication topic! We hope our break-down of the different relationships you’ll be managing has helped you get a sense for how to more successfully communicate with people on a professional level. This may or may not be our last topic for a while—the Three Jaguars are hard at work on a business case for a web comic—but in the mean-time, we hope you’ll enjoy the Three Jaguars columns archived online. You can also step back through the three jaguars tag on Livejournal, if you prefer LJ. And as always, if you’re enjoying the Three Jaguars, leave us a tip, or share the link!

So, we’ve dealt (effectively, we hope!) with fans and customers and patrons. Let’s move on to the next set of people. This business of communication, it never ends…

Communicating with Business Partners: Business Manager

     As an artist running your own business, you’re going to need to interface with a lot of people in pursuit of your business goals. Banks, coordinators, agents, freelancers, corporate buyers, gallery owners and venue operators, licensors and distributors… the list goes on and on. You can minimize your contact with people outside your studio, but your business will die quickly without partnerships. It doesn’t matter if you’re writing books or making costumes, you will need supplies, business licenses and people to help you get your work into the right hands.
     The proper person to manage these relationships is Business Manager. She’s the one with the account books and an understanding of the bottom line. She’s the one who’ll be able to evaluate these partners on their performance: are they doing the job? Are they doing it well? Is it worth the hassle/expense to maintain the partnership? What have they done for you?

     So here’s the watchword for communicating with business partners: equality.

      Why? Because you are not a beggar. Too many creatives setting up their own businesses buy their business licenses and then continue thinking of themselves as individuals with brushes and keyboards, hoping to get people to like their stuff. Once you start paying taxes, you are no longer just the Artist; you’re a small businessperson, running your own enterprise. You don’t need other people’s charity; you are making money, and you’re looking for people to help you do it… people who will not so incidentally get a share of your profit. Repeat these things after the Jaguars:

      Have you got that? Put it on your wall. You are not a charitable cause. You do not need to beg for people’s money or help. You are there to present a case on why doing business with you is a good risk. They get to decide whether to take that chance.
      Let’s talk about specifics.

Networking
      One of the first places Artist fails in business communication is networking… because she is too aware of the importance of other people, and wonders why they should choose to talk to her instead of some other artist. This worry drains away all her natural brilliance and makes her look timid and desperate, and no one likes the scent of desperation. So as tempting as it is to have Artist show up to network with business contacts… send her back to the studio. Marketer and Business Manager work together at networking events; Business Manager evaluates the crowd and decides who should be approached, and Marketer goes off to be shiny and excited at them… with Business Manager at her shoulder to keep her from getting carried away. (Marketer and Artist have a tendency to promise things in the heat of the moment that they should probably have thought through more carefully, so make sure Business Manager is riding herd on them whenever they’re out.)
      Your goal at networking events, whether it’s a party or a convention or a fair, is to think of everyone as a potential partner. A potential partner, not a victim, not a godlet who would never be interested in you, and not a target to be hunted down. These are all people, business people like you, who may or may not have something to offer, and what you’re seeking is a mutually beneficial business relationship.
      The jaguars cannot emphasize enough how important it is to keep a clear perspective on people at networking events. So here are some principles for networking:

1. Be interested.
      Sound familiar? The people at networking events are involved in the same things you are, and that gives you a great deal in common. Additionally, they are involved in segments of the business you might not be. The layout specialist knows things about books you don’t as a writer (unless you also do layout!), and might pass some fascinating stories and tips to you. The maintainer of the famous cosplay blog can tell you what kinds of posts got the most attention, and what kind of things she thinks are newsworthy. The lighting expert can tell you what kind of effects are possible on stage and which look ridiculous or cost too much. Ask about what someone does and be interested in their answers. Learn as much as you can. Share your own experiences in kind—

2. Don’t Make it All About You
      —but don’t take over the conversation and talk about your latest awesome, whatever that was. Don’t talk about how brilliant you are, either, and nothing else. Don’t go into monologue mode and don’t try to sell yourself.

But wait! Isn’t that the point of networking?

     No! The point of networking is to find good relationships. Relationships exist between two people… that means you and someone else. Not just you. If you spend all your time talking yourself up, you’ll never have the chance to evaluate someone else’s talents and personality. You’re looking for a good fit for your needs and your style. The highest-power distributor in the entire room might be someone who hates methodical workers—what if you’re one of them? Even if you manage to interest that person into signing you on, they’ll never be as invested in your success as the medium-sized distributor who’s looking for dependable, less volatile artists. That person might be very excited to work with you, and do a lot more for you, and you would never have known because you were too busy talking about yourself to listen.

3. Don’t Be Catty.
      The other powerfully helpful thing you can do about yourself is… don’t talk about other people. Unless you admire them! But don’t expose any of your secret doubts, fears, or jealousies. Nothing turns someone off more than hearing someone tear down another artist. It hints at the kind of emotional instability that leads to prima donna behavior, and no one wants to deal with a prima donna when they can go with someone more sensible. Be professional, be courteous. Never say cruel or mean things about other artists. It’s a good idea anyway, for your emotional health. It just also happens to be good for your reputation.
      If you do admire other artists, feel free to mention them now and then when the conversation is appropriate. Doing so demonstrates that you have enough self-confidence not to be threatened by other people’s success. Nothing says ‘winner’ like someone who doesn’t have to tear other people down to feel good or get ahead.

4. Pay Attention to Your Peers.
      If you approach a likely person and discover they’re not a potential business contact, but rather an Artist in search of them like yourself… don’t cut them off. Apply the same principles you would to a potential business partner: be interested, don’t make it all about you, don’t be catty, and get their business card. They may have had experiences you can learn from… they might even become friends.

But wait! This all feels very Machiavellian. Aren’t I being disingenuous here?

      Not at all. You are putting your best foot forward, and disciplining yourself to be courteous, friendly and interested. You are learning from other people, listening to them, and keeping yourself from saying mean things (which is, after all, something our mothers have been telling us to do since we were old enough to talk). The reason that acting this way is good for your reputation is because it’s the behavior of someone thoughtful, mature and with some self-control. Your goal is to be that thoughtful, mature and self-disciplined person, and let your reputation take care of itself. But being that way takes work, and the work sounds to jaundiced ears like putting on a mask. It’s not. It’s practicing being a good businessperson, and a good person.
      Contrary to popular belief, that does require practice. So don’t put it off!

Following Up
     So you’ve done some networking, gotten some names…
     …and this is where people usually stop. They manage the first part of networking, opening the channel… but they never follow through. Almost invariably this is due to a lack of confidence, or a desire not to bother someone.
     Think you’re not doing one of these things? Have you ever thought the following:

‘Oh, this project isn’t quite right for them.’
‘I’m not ready to pitch this one, I’ll get back to them when I am.’

     All of these interior comments are signs of procrastination. Repeat after Marketer:

     Once again: you must stop thinking like an Artist. When your work becomes your job, you need to ping your contacts to see if they’re interested in what you’re doing, so you have a sense of whether you’re going to have a market for it before you’re done. Nor can you do someone’s job for them. If you have an editor who likes fantasy, and your fantasy has modern elements, or romantic ones… let the editor decide if she wants to look at it. You don’t have to read someone’s mind before you ask them if they’re interested. Don’t let yourself get in your own way. Don’t tell yourself you’re not ready; if you’re not ready now, you never will be, because it’s not about your confidence in the project, it’s about your confidence in whether someone else will want it. And the only way to resolve that question… is to find out.
     Send that email, fax, pick up the phone. Write out a script if you’re going to be talking on the phone, it will help with the shakes. Make a template for the email. Something like this:

Dear Networking Contact:

We met at Function X, where we discussed [something interesting/memorable]. I have a project that might suit your [product line/catalog/label/imprint/etc]. It’s a [short description of product: one phrase or sentence at most]. I’ve attached a [sample/synopsis/photo/etc]. Tell me if it looks like a good fit.

Yours,
Business Manager

     Notice that nowhere in this letter do we mention whether the project is finished. If your business contact isn’t interested, then there’s no rush. If he is, well… there’s incentive for you to finish. If you’re close to finished, put in a few all-nighters. If it’s going to be longer than a week, send a partial to the contact so they can decide whether they want to go forward with it.
Whatever you do, don’t let those business contacts lie fallow. You acquired them for a reason.

Maintaining the Relationship without a Project

…but wait! You don’t have a project you could pitch them. At all!

      There’s no reason not to keep a line open to someone even if you don’t have a project to pitch them. Maybe you’re between albums, or you’re retooling to do a new style of jewelry, or you’re taking half a year off to do research and continued education. That doesn’t mean your contact doesn’t have useful information you might want. Maybe you’ve run into a fabric supplier and taken their number, and you’re not currently buying to make costumes… but you run into some new fabric on some website and want to know more about it. Why not ask? Your contact has the expertise. The layout freelancer you shook hands with at a convention; even if you don’t have a job for him, he might be willing to answer your questions about font choices and book packaging. The editor who buys fantasy might be able to tell you who to contact to buy romance.
      Your networking contacts are not cardboard cut-outs whose only talents are helping you with specific projects. They are part of a business ecosystem, complex and interwoven. If you cut yourself off from their entire expertise, you are missing out on a vast fund of knowledge and goodwill and opportunity.
      So stop neglecting your contacts. And remember, if someone contacts you to ask you about something… that’s your chance to become a valued part of the network.

      …and from here, we pause for an important digression.

Positive Language
      One of the most difficult things for Artists to learn is the art of positive business language. Their lack of self-confidence often sabotages them: they either go the route of being too self-effacing and use weak language that makes them sound like poor risks; or they go in the opposite direction and talk about themselves constantly, declaring that of course you will love them because they are brilliant, and turn off just about everyone.
      Positive business language is neither self-aggrandizing or self-deflating. It is confident, friendly and professional. Compare the following:

      “Here’s my stuff. Um, yes, that’s $5. I know it’s a lot, but it costs $3 to make…”

With:

      “Hi, how are you? Ah, yes, those are $5. I also have a lower-cost option over here at $2, if you like stickers. If you want to see the image better, check out these posters.”

Or these two:

      “I just finished this… it’s not as good as I hoped it would be, but at least it’s finished.”

VS.

      “Here’s my latest piece. I learned a great deal from it, which I hope to apply to my next project, already on my work table.”

      Your job is not to apologize for being an artist or for your work. You should not be embarrassed to ask for your prices, should not belabor your mistakes or errors—you can admit them if asked, or you must admit them if they’re related to a product mix-up, but you shouldn’t beat yourself about them in public. You shouldn’t think of yourself as a beggar when approaching business partners or customers. You are offering something of value to people who might be interested, or not, and both cases are okay and normal and good.
      The number one thing to avoid in your language is deciding in advance what someone is going to feel and telling them. For two reasons: first, it’s rude; you don’t know whether someone is going to like or dislike something, and telling them will not convince them of your telepathy, it will irritate them. Secondly, particularly when it’s a negative feeling, it has a chance of influencing them to agree with you. If you tell someone ‘it’s not very good, I made a lot of mistakes…’ then you have primed them to look for mistakes. In fact, they will seek the mistakes before they even see the piece. Don’t prejudge the work for someone else. Tell them ‘here it is’ and grant them the right to make their own judgment. Without your help.

Sealing the Deal: Contracts
      So you’ve made a decision to do business with someone, whether that person’s a contractor, a bank, a distributor, another company, a friend who freelances.
      Get a contract/agreement.
      Read the contract/agreement.
      There is no substitute for these steps. Like other kinds of relationships, business partnerships benefit from knowing where the boundaries are and what each party’s expectations are. Happy, long-lasting relationships are good at communication and responsibilities. The contract will help both of you set out those responsibilities and expectations so that no one is surprised by anything, or uncomfortable doing the labor/exchanging the goods and services.

But wait! What if you’re dealing with a friend?

      The jaguars know it seems painful to ask a friend to sign a contract, but it’s still the safest way to keep things on track. If it makes you feel better, don’t call it a contract… call it a list of deliverables, or a schedule. Put something down in writing that makes it clear what you are giving one another… or be prepared not to count on it to happen.
      Which is fine, if you’re willing to let things go if they don’t happen. If it is important, though, we encourage you to either get that agreement… or pay someone to do it on time, and according to your needs.
      If you are accepting an agreement from a company, read the agreement and make sure you understand it. Check out a book from the library on contract law if you want to figure it out yourself, or ask your business partner for clarification if you don’t understand something in the agreement. If the document is long and complicated enough, consider hiring a legal aide for an hour to have a look with you and teach you what something means. Make sure that legal aide is conversant in that particular kind of law; a child custody lawyer won’t understand the nuances in a book contract the way a Intellectual Property law specialist will.
      If the deal still looks good to you after reading the contract, sign it.
      If it doesn’t, negotiate.

      That’s right. Who said you have to accept something as-is? Some types of business won’t allow negotiation, but it never hurts to ask. For most creative business partnerships, however, negotiation is expected. Check off some items that you want revised or discussed and go forth to discuss them. Before you go into that discussion, have your counter-offers prepared, and consider what kinds of compromises you’re prepared to make. Make a list of your priorities and goals, and be ready to evaluate whether a compromise suggested in the meeting or follow-up will still meet those priorities and goals. If it doesn’t, say so.
      Most business partners will be willing to negotiate, particularly if there’s some give-and-take: you compromise on some things to get the things you really want; they do the same. But if after negotiation you still don’t like the contract… walk away.
      Did you really expect the jaguars to say otherwise?
      In the end, this is your art, and your livelihood. No one is going to care about it the way you do. You owe it to yourself to fight for fair treatment and for the goals you want to achieve. Never believe that you need to cage yourself into the prison of a bad contract ‘because that’s the only way you can make it.’ Say no, and use that self-respect to find a different way. There’s always a different way. Even if you have to chart the course yourself.

     This concludes Part 2 of our chapter on communication. Next week Artist finally gets to have her say in Part 3, Communicating with Peers! Stay tuned! If you’re new to the Three Jaguars, you can check out my index of topics here, or just step back through the three jaguars tag on Livejournal. And as always, if you’re enjoying the Three Jaguars, leave us a tip, or share the link!